Gopher tortoises fight to solve conflicts. They bump and ram until one of them runs away. A gopher tortoise fight is normal but it is not the way well socialized children should handle conflict. Watch this video to see how NOT to handle conflict unless you are a tortoise of course.

It is important to teach children proper social skills like dealing with conflicts peacefully.  Children need to learn that fighting is a dangerous way to handle a conflict. Losing control in a tense situation is upsetting, scary and can damage friendships. Unlike gopher tortoises that fight, children can learn to use words to work out their problems. They can figure out what goal they would like to achieve and consider options to reach that goal. “I would like a chance to use the swing. I can suggest to my friend that we each use the swing for five minutes.” Conflicts among children can end well without the aid of an adult.

If you would like to teach children how to handle conflict appropriately and many other important social skills and modern etiquette topics become a certified social skills trainer. Pick a program and start learning today.

A big thank you to my sons Noah and Seth.  Noah, great job shooting this cool video and editing it so well. Way to go Seth for your skillful piano playing of Gymnopedie I by Eric Satie. Please stop fighting like gopher tortoises.